Open Session

Becoming a better parent through open discussion of parenting issues

Bittersweet Christmas December 26, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — aprilgrant @ 5:55 am

Preface: I love Christmas and I especially love giving.*

This Christmas was great! For the first time, I was able to purchase everything my son put on his  . Well, ok, this is the first year he’s written a wish list. But in seeing it, my eyes did not get wide, nor did I stress. With planning, we were able to purchase every gift with cash.

I stayed up late on Christmas eve, to finish decorating, checking and wrapping the biggest gifts, placing them under the tree and taking a picture to remember and be grateful for all that I have and the ability to provide wants as well as needs for my family. The tree topped it off with the scent of pine.

Christmas morning was a busy one. We attended the Christmas service at 8 am, but as a choir member, I was expected to be there at 7. A beautiful service was received by my ever-do-patient son, who had to wait to open his gifts. He helped me cook breakfast for the family, only to be so excited by the gifts that he did not eat. Gifts were unwrapped one at a time, in order: son, dad, mom. Cleaning up as we went along.

I was very proud of my son, his patience, his willingness to listen and his appreciation. It was a nice.morning and everyone was happy and grateful for their gifts.

My siblings decided that they wanted to drop over for a bit. I wasn’t expecting much, really nothing, but held out hope that some things would change. They came over around noon, without a gift, not so much as a card in hand. I wasn’t surprised, but it hurt still the same. After a couple of hours chatting and playing Wii, I found out that their next destination was my father’s house. Well, he was the man who was in the house while I was growing up, the only man close enough to be a father figure. He was hosting a Christmas dinner, for his children – the two whom he contributed to their birth. At that point, I realized that I was thought of so minimally that the fact that they were invited and I was not was not even questioned. Not even enough to keep it a secret.

This is the household I grew up in and was created for me. This action, or lack thereof, was the theme of my life. I’ll change that, is the theme of my life with the family who raised me. It has been nothing, if not consistent.

I am grateful for the family that I have entered into and chosen. I am grateful for the life that lies ahead. As the holidays pass by, I hope to leave behind my past.

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